The Power of
Negative Feedback

Kaushiki Shamsha Singh

April 26, 2023

It's a fact that a negative stimuli gets more attention and processing, so we remember insults more than praise. The same goes when you receive feedback from others. We have a tendency to ignore the good ones and remember and focus on the not-so-good ones, giving more weightage to fewer amounts of negative feedback with respect to a higher amounts of positive feedback.

Why do we enjoy hearing compliments about ourselves and take offence at criticism? Nevertheless, refusing to hear criticism is similar to living in a cocoon and ignoring reality. When given constructively, negative feedback can help us identify areas of weakness and give us the motivation to do better.

To be honest, I did not hold this opinion during my college days or the early years of my career, and I used to feel bad, but I see that today's generation understands the importance of feedback much better than many of us and does not wait for it but rather proactively asks for it. Our Office Vibe data shows that people expect better and more frequent feedback, but most managers and peers fear giving negative feedback because most people hate hearing it.

If the feedback is positive, great! We should feel happy about it and not be overconfident, as it might lead to events that will turn it into negative feedback in the future. But if there is negative feedback, I think we should learn to handle it more responsibly, as it can also be a great opportunity for growth and improvement.

Based on my experiences, I'd like to make the following suggestions for dealing with negative feedback constructively and improving:

✍️ Don’t take it personally and stay calm

It’s easy to get defensive when you hear criticism, but it’s important to remember that it’s not an attack on you as a person. Instead, it’s feedback that can help you become more aware of your weaknesses and help you work on them.

✍️ Acknowledge it by saying that you’ve heard the feedback and understand it

This will help you process the criticism and take it seriously.

✍️ Don’t be afraid to ask questions to gain more insight into it

This will help you better understand what needs to be improved and how you can go about doing it.

✍️ Always respond constructively

This is just as important for you as it is for the person giving it. This would mean you are being open to the criticism and not being defensive or attacking the person who gave it.

✍️ Work on a plan to address the issues that led to the negative feedback

This should include steps that you can take to improve; make it part of your developmental goals. A performance improvement plan is also an option that managers could initiate (it shouldn’t be looked down upon; it's a very powerful tool that gives clarity on expectations and helps improve performance).

✍️ Follow up

Lastly, follow up with the person who gave the feedback to show them that their feedback was taken seriously and that you are working on it.

Above all the things said and written, the most important thing is to know where that feedback is coming from; do you believe in those people and that they have no hidden agenda and want to contribute to your growth and success? Then, putting all your egos aside, get to work on it. The rest is simply background noise that you can ignore and move on from (noise-canceling earbuds are highly recommended 😉).

There are so many trolls that even if you are doing your best, they will never appreciate you, so for them, "Ignorance is the best policy," most importantly for your own mental health and wellbeing. A retrospective is so important in these cases. 

Finally, everyone needs a little tough love! And delivering it the right way will make us more engaged !